Being brought up in the faith I was taught from an early age that honesty was a very important value and trait to have, here is what the witness website says on the matter: “The righteous is walking in his integrity,” states Proverbs 20:7. An honest person is a person of integrity. He never cheats or deceives his fellow man. Is that not how you wish others to treat you? Honesty is basic to true worship. It is an expression of our love for God and neighbour. By being honest, we show our desire to follow the principle of conduct expressed by Jesus: “All things, therefore, that you want men to do to you, you also must likewise do to them.”—Matthew 7:12; 22:36-39.
At this point we are given a clear understanding of the religions view of honesty and integrity. This was what I was taught as a youngster. I had no idea however that I would fall foul of this rule in the future. The website continues: “To be honest at all times may have its price, but the clean conscience that results is worth far more than anything it may cost. In the long run, being honest and upright pays the richest of dividends. The truth is that a good relationship with Jehovah is priceless. Why damage it by resorting to something dishonest in order to save face or gain some illegal advantage? Whatever challenge we may face, we can have confidence in the words of the psalmist: “Happy is the able-bodied man that has put Jehovah as his trust and that has not turned his face to defiant people, nor to those falling away to lies.”—Psalm 40:4.”
So at this point I had made up my mind, I was living a lie! By allowing people who I respected think that I was a believer in the faith surely I was deceiving them? So I decided to exercise my “integrity” and no longer cheat and deceive my fellow man! I decided to just tell them that I no longer believed it! According to the above quote “in the long run, being honest and upright pays the richest of dividends”. This, it soon became apparent was not the case.
What pushed me into such a decision, as it would be at this stage the easiest thing to just carry on as always. Being the type of person I am, or at least was, to just drift along wouldn’t have been the worst thing, plus when you factor in the “fear of the unknown” into the equation, it would have most definitely not have been the worst thing to do at that point!